Gnomezilla

It's worth mentioning how much I've overheard 'and my girlfriend got into this game and picked Seamus'. Which I still kind of struggle to understand. I guess the pretty dresses override the fluff that the rotten belles are zombie whores and Seamus murdered and reanimated them all. Ok maybe the game play is kind of easy to learn too. Belles lure one model closer and pounce on it for attacks that do not cost them AP, Madame Sybelle whips them for interesting triggered effects (whip! you can't score, whip! I command your model, whip! pay now or die), Seamus just teleports around and shoots things very hard (and he is a very good way to teach about the good use of the focus action) (stupid red joker on damage two turns in a row). It is a good powered box, everything in it works well, if the worst happens and she does not like it someone will always happily buy it from you. I have little snips of battle reports written out too. It mostly has my master behaving very stupidly because he got lured. It is worth losing the duels sometimes just to hear the remarks people come up with.

That's what I intended. Looking at it from Som'er's POV, exchanging a gremlin that never shuts up and doesn't shoot great for something which never talks, never hogs the 'shine, and shoots everything so long as it's standing near Lenny (go, perpetual automatic raking fire triggers!) was ideal. As for Sparks constructifying everything in Guild's sight, my current giggle is the thought of taking a Sh7 loop out to the field, maybe throw in the Emissary for extra squee, and ventilate anyone who thought they were guaranteed a pure melee menace Hoffball. Or maybe using the pale rider's ultimate attack on turn four instead of five. There's options. How about moving Trixiebelle into any crew which lives or dies by seizing initiative? Say, the Viktorias?....I'm sure there's the outfit of at least one dead ronin somewhere in the camp that she can borrow to blend in. But, of course, keeping the cowboy hat. One sashaying green Asian fantasy cowgirl, coming up! (Although for the sake of a short story, I'd have to have her try to sweet-talk her way into working with Leveticus. Not sure whether Alyce would make an instant new best friend, or develop another case of 'extra-wide line of fire'.)

I was going to blame some LaCroix for stuffing the ballot box, but the simplest answer is the best. You all should know my stance on giant stompybots by now. What's good enough for them is good enough for me!

I sold stuff on pre-order and the buyers also got their promo figures, but that shop had fully itemized receipts with the names and SKUs of all the purchases (and the shop's physical address--if you're doing a composite anyway, grab a business card too) so there wasn't as much need for supporting evidence.

I have made a composite photo with the screenshots of Square receipts for multiple purchases plus photos of the boxes plus paper receipts of the individual prices (so it could be shown they all added up) and gotten the promo figure. As someone who worked in a game store though I'd have advised you to get just one more item to bump the pre-tax total over $60.

Also, the hula girl is an alt-tengu scheme marker hopping type, the cabana boy is an alt-Guild-pathfinder so I can drop mixed drinks shots traps and make the walk duels more interesting, the undead hula girl is an alt-Ten-Thunders-Brother, and the octopus is an alt-Dawn-Serpent.

Fine, we'll up the ante then on the 'something for everyone' box: a hula girl (with lei, without top), a cabana boy (same, and add drink in a hollowed-out pineapple), and a flesh-construct-esque hulking undead in a little spangly dress, sporting a lovely pair of coconuts.

Not all that alternative but would probably sell like hotcakes: a 'something for everyone' mixed pack of alternative belles/performers/beckoners/oiran (with stat cards for any of these) with different aesthetics. Buff guy? check. Pin-up woman? check. So long dead you can't even tell any more? check. Extra bonus points if the undead is styled after Wyrd Chronicles #20, tall and lurching and complete with little spangly dress. We want watcher boxes!: the Illuminatus! option with flying-pyramid-with-an-eye watchers, a tellurian soulstone miner with wings, a union miner with a tinfoil hat because what's the working man without his secret society? Infiltration: all the models are two gremlins in an overcoat, or pigs stuffed into suits, trying to pass as human or Neverborn.

It would never stand as the most legendary raid in Gremlin history--that honor, like it or not (and make no mistake, Som'er did not), would stand forever with the LaCroix. Still, this one hadn't done poorly. They'd managed the one-two punch of getting rid of one of the most annoying gremlins there was (who was not an uppity LaCroix) and bagging something interesting to drag into the swamp. It did take more than one hit upside the head from Lenny's log to get him subdued, and less than it took to knock out the gremlin they dropped off. Even counting by Som'er's shaky math skills, it was a good trade. "Lenny!" he hollered. "Has it woken up yet?" "...Dunno." Shoulda yelled at a bayou bro and maybe gotten an answer, he thought. Now he couldn't go yell at one or it'd look like he'd been wrong in the first place. He whirled around and let the coat swing out all impressive-like, like that was the point, and not just turning around to go look at developments himself, like he had nothing better to do. But as he stumped through the mud to Lenny and the new acquisition, Som'er was forced to admit that Lenny'd been right. It was standing up, alright, but anything that didn't at least twitch when it was prodded by a boomstick wasn't exactly awake neither. Som'er prodded. Som'er hollered. Som'er poked. Som'er was ignored by both giant lumbering things towering over him, and more importantly, over his hat. Som'er didn't like that, and swore, "What'd'I need to do to get this dang thing to fire?!" On hearing the word, it started to fire--and didn't stop. Lenny's log stopped several bullets, Somer's hat got ventilated, and the bayou gremlins milling around would later be shaking lead out of their clothes for hours. Meanwhile, back in Guild territory, a very groggy and sore-headed gremlin was waking up flat on his back. The first thing he saw was, close to his face and thin and metallic, so close he had to cross his eyes to focus on it, an end of a torch. And when he focused on it, the torch-bearer struck the spark. "Hey! I ain't a robot!" he yelped. "I had noticed that." Sparks uncrossed his eyes and looked a little further on. "Now you, mister, you got enough metal platin' to be a robot." Hoffman flicked the igniter again. "Construct. This is a construct workshop." "Alright, construct, robot, whatever y'like." Sparks tried to maneuver out from under the torch, but the soulstone torch twisted to that side and this time lit with its flame at full power. He rolled back to where he'd started, a tad singed, and Hoffman cut the power. Sparks had gotten a glimpse of rows of robo-- of constructs, and of another human standing nearby and looking like a guy the railworkers would've enjoyed kicking whenever they could get away with it. He'd gotten a feel for unnecessary supervisory authority while working on the rail lines, and this human had it. "He a construct too?" "No. This is a workshop for constructs only. Which is why it is most unusual to find you here, where a particular construct ought to be." "I don't know about that!" yelped Sparks. "I got knocked out afore! I must've gotten dragged here!" Out of the corner of his eye the gremlin could see the authority frown. Time to change the topic, fast. "Now if you got this guy in your workshop, that's no problem, I'll make him a robot and then he'll belong. Construct! I forgot. I forgot--" The authority started to say something, but a manipulator arm folded out from Hoffman's harness and made a hushing gesture. Another metallic arm extended a clipboard and pen. "'Make' him a construct, you say?" asked Hoffman. "Tell me more."

Aren't you going to proxy it with Avatar of Amalgamation? Fill out the list with witchling types for more greatswordy goodness and it'll be the Swords of Overcompensation list...

I'm still not convinced the enhanced tag-along benefits are necessary, especially with the sanctioned spellcaster in faction, but the addition to power loop solves both problems that will develop with power creep over time: that boosting (say) defenses to 6 has meant less as more models were released with an attack not at the baseline of 5, and that there were more armor ignoring options available to all factions as well. And yes, it would make the tactical decision of what to loop when be influenced by defensive needs again, instead of just offensive (because spreading around that number 7 for melee is more attractive and urgent than spreading that number 6). Also, tying the armor-negation-negation to power loop means there comes a counter to it again in condition removal, which should ease the minds of our opponents knowing that a counter still exists--they'll just have to spend AP for it.

In light of today's Outcast master's front of card automatic ability, I retract this statement. Sod the playtesting--just give Legalese aura the same automatic ability to override scheme marker ownership. And in light of once again having to dip into Outcasts to justify the power of something meant for Guild, add in a few more exclamations learned in the smoky blue air of a construct workshop...

I thought you were supposed to have the master use the shock collar on the spellcaster, not the other way 'round, though I suppose it would work... (Yes, they're on my shopping list.) "Repeat after me: 'I am not to go chasing after strange women in the street, no matter how horny I am.' " "I maintain this is entirely unnecessa--*ZAP*--I did have the foresight to earth this ...."

Or so I tell myself every time I face Perdita. It's the chain activations that are doing it, too. Armor negation is annoying. Chain activation is fatal. Complicated play, unpredictable AP (from the obey style of machine puppet), and giant stompybots some of which perform better than they do in their native faction--what's not to love? All the style points for you, sir! I'd love McMourning too, but given that I can and will turn the battle commentary into a complete panto while playing Hoffman*, it may be best for the peace and sanity of my group if I never do play McMourning again. *Every time. Every damn time. Power loop up, rotten belles lure my constructs. Power loop down, constructs resist. Conclusions can be drawn.

*the Malifaux Child is removed from the table for the duration of this post, she doesn't need to hear this* They were 'happy dappy alive and well' _before he got his hands on them_. Leveticus flensed the souls out of them to make use of the bodily shells. Go ask Alyce for the exact count.... The only good thing Leveticus does is keep Rusty Alyce in check. It must piss her off no end to have a problem that she cannot solve by shooting it, and while she's trying to solve it, she's not shooting a lot of other people. (And in turn she keeps him in check. Someone in Malifaux with that much of the puzzle of life and death unraveled should be on a path straight to attempted Tyranthood, and to perdition with tomorrow and the ones beside you. And yet he's set his face dead against that, with some evidence it's for her sake he gives a damn about their being a tomorrow.)

...shut up, go away, and don't take you-know-who with you when you go! (, especially to those who were subjected to my shirty little "Pariah of Iron hiring list is a disgrace" rant last Malifaux session--surprised Peter O'Toole didn't rise from the grave to tell me to tone the theatrics down a little) I push Lady J and the Ortegas to neutral on the lawful-chaotic axis. If the Governor-General was standing between Lady J and something which needed to be put down, I wouldn't give odds on him surviving, and the Ortegas (as noted) are a law unto themselves. Wait a minute...do you really literally mean Perdita-of-the-Tarakians (and whoa if you remembered that very long ago reference), in which case I want to change my answer....

We can argue about good and evil all day, but if you want lawful, well...stroll along with me and have a chat with a Guild Lawyer... (Because "battle lawyer" isn't far behind "zombie whores" in phrases that make people go "wait, WHAT kind of game is this...tell me more...") What didn't you like about playing Arcanists? I want to know to fine-tune the suggestion of what master to go for within Guild. Although nobody can argue that our henchman coming soon Master Queeg is not a total shitpile of a lawful evil human being.

Silhouette of the Guild master I am 95% sure is female (I will never be 100% so long as Leveticus has his current sculpt. Damn but that boy got a narrow waist somehow). The redhead betting pool doesn't have odds set yet. Good eye to catch that they both have cameras. I don't know what we will get. A reporter, a spirit-photographer, an artist, someone who kills with magic poetry...

Brutal effigy! It's inexpensive, it's adorable, it's aesthetically matched with the death marshals and therefore with Guild, its buff works in a henchman-led crew as well as a proper size game, almost every master can get good use out of it either as buff bot or as scheme runner. Guild sergeants are meant to work with guardsmen, and models of that type are generally in separate boxes not crew boxes. Don't prioritize buying those yet. Witchling handlers are like sergeants in that they're meant to work with a type (witchling stalkers) but they have additional uses which make them something to buy before sergeants. They only buff Perdita's box in one way (giving out burning +1 on attacks within a handler's aura), so it would be better to buy some separate boxes with other models that they can also buff in other ways before getting handlers. I learned with Hoffman and his box so I don't have any input on the Perdita/Sonnia learning curve. I am told Hoffman's learning curve is steeper than most. I choose to believe it.

I haven't seen mounted guard in play yet so I'm not quite sure what the range is on that executioner delivery system. Strangemetal Shirt off of McCabe is nicer than I expected, though, so hope it works for you to make them resilient. Not against leaders. Peacekeeper, Hoff crew, mobile toolkit, +4 armor, sit back with a prevention cache and quietly giggle at neutralize attempts. I do, but not with McCabe. McCabe's crews are fast, he is not. Of late his use has been to cuff some sense into Hoffman when rotten belles are out and about. "Lucy! We have to stop meeting like this!--" [By Your Side activates] "Yes. You do." [Laugh Off activates] (In unrelated news, Seamus' player finally had time recently to go through some of the older lore, and announced with glee that she'd found the original names of the belles. Which led to, on my side, some gulping, blinking, and croaking "...she was actually named Lucy?" )

I'd have to see it playtested. I WANT to see it playtested. 4" is also the distance of dropped scheme marker separation so it wouldn't shut that many markers which cost AP but it would do a lovely job muddying the works of Finish the Job, Deliver Orders, etc. And, as mentioned, not worse than Hamelin's 6" aura overlooking height 1 hordes. Lucius' crews aren't generally short.

I did say guardsman, at first, to include sergeants etc., but then dropped the idea of also boosting those who manipulate scheme marker placement and cut the idea down to only those who move themselves to scheme markers and need the help with mobility. It'll get guild guards into the thick of the fighting but not into the opponent's half of the table to score. Also, wastrels with their potential 2AP 12" teleport to scheme marker don't feel broken, so giving the less damaging guards that kind of movement feels solid. Also also, Lucius' schtick ought to be control at range, and so letting some more guardsmen get more movement so they also can spread out and share the range may help. As carefully as his laying claim to enemy scheme markers at the end of the game? Just give him that back at the end of any given turn. Or worse, give him four enemy scheme markers over the course of the game, to be selected on whichever turn he so chooses. I'll take two this turn (that'll be no full points set up for you, and oops you aren't scoring convict labor this turn either) and leave two in reserve....

That's fine then, leave it aside and leave them immobile. Would it be any sort of boost to guild guard to let them (and expert sleuths) move up to strategy markers as well as scheme markers?

Would you take a guardsman specific, rare 1, cost unknown to change guardsmens' scheme marker shenanigans from whatever their restricted type is (enemy for guild guard, friendly for guild hound/sergeant) to either all scheme markers (cost 0), or all scheme AND STRATEGY markers (cost 1 or 2, because kicking, say, stash markers changes everything)?

I had character and item, what about @The Grue?